By Donna Hoffmeyer
As I started to write my blog, I was sitting, watching a movie with my family, and heard the statement, “Maybe she didn’t die for nothing.” (I’m not going to name the movie, because I’ll spoil it.)
Before I go any further, I’ll place a trigger warning here. If you are sensitive to war details, please skip this.
Memorial Day is to honor our fallen soldiers. My civilian friends, we will always take a kind thank you. But on this day, we have no desire to be honored…it irritates us a bit. It is a day of remembrance, and a damn hard day for many of us. Every single post you see from our Veterans is a connection to a memory.
There is nothing I can write that would offer any comfort or insight to our Veterans. They already know. They were there. They watched their buddy take a fatal bullet; looked in horror as the convoy in front of them hit an IED; screamed for the medic as they did their best to stop the bleeding; and held the hand of their friends, telling them they will be okay when they knew in their heart they were not going to make it. They have watched their battle buddy come home and succumb to PTSD, so severe, they only knew one way out to stop the never-ending pain. They have been the first to tell families news that will forever change their lives, and the last to pay final respects. They are the ones to keep their memories alive, so no one forgets what was given up for freedom.
Every day we all witness freedom. We see protests. We see people speaking out against the government; people standing up and speaking out for what they believe is right/just; people choosing their religion; people choosing who to marry; and people choosing what to wear. People choosing their jobs; choosing to vaccinate…or not; and choosing which school to attend. People are making these choices without the threat of imprisonment or reform camps. Our civilians take this for granted, for they know nothing different.
Veterans, on the other hand, embed every bit of our freedom into their consciousness. We think to ourselves, “You’re welcome. This is why our buddies died…for our freedom.”
No, we may not always agree with what is being vocalized, protested, or boycotted. Colin Kaepernick was probably one of the best examples. Many Veterans and service members did not agree with his actions. However, these same people also reminded our civilian counterparts, his freedom to kneel, was also a validation of the freedom they fought for, and others have died for.
When the Ukraine war broke out, I was elated to see many people in Russia stand in the streets and protest Putin’s actions; while others put out calls to action on social media to voice their frustration and animosity toward their government’s bullying actions. I also watched in dismay, as thousands upon thousands were arrested as they vocalized their concerns. Peaceful protesting…shut down at every corner.
We know all too well; freedom is a protected luxury. We have been in countries that stone their people for adultery; limit rights based on gender, and torture those that do not conform. We are acutely aware of the impact of losing our freedom. So much so, that we are willing to give the ultimate sacrifice.
And on this day, we honor those that have.
My civilian friends, please do not come up and thank us today. Come up to us and say “We are thankful for the freedom we have because of the sacrifices of your brother and sisters.” The majority of us will reflect on someone we know and proudly say thank you on their behalf. Show your appreciation by placing a flag on the many gravestones of these silent heroes. Before you dig into your BBQ, take a moment of silence and remember those that sacrificed so you could have this day with your friends and family. When you see the gold star family (someone that has lost their military family member) tell them you are thankful for the sacrifice their loved one gave for our country’s freedom. Your sincere gratitude is a reminder to them they did not die in vain…rather they died with purpose.
Take this day to be present and acknowledge the privileges we are afforded, by those no longer with us.
