This I Perceive… The Zero Veteran
By Mike Kim Veteran
Recently I heard the popular self-improvement guru and Veteran, Jocko
Willink, discuss on his podcast, the meaning of maximizing the day and
how it does not matter what you did yesterday for maximizing human
potential. This is a powerful message. And yet, being aware of yesterday
and embracing yesterday allows room for greater self-interpretation.
It does not matter how great you were yesterday, according to Willink. Your life, according to Willink is about today. Today is “Zero” and you must produce great results to have true value and reward. Your life is defined at the time you wake up each morning and just “Crush it!” What Jocko talks about is something indirectly promoted by much of society. I have seen this dynamic message influence many in the Veteran community.
But let me tell you about Veterans who have been “Zeroed Out’. I have friends and associates in the warrior community who have taken their lives and became part of mass media and government statistics tied to Veteran suicide. They struggled with waking up in the morning even getting killer in and influencing others. I noticed that they were not making room to rest and reflex on the many other yesterdays that included serving as a Ranger-tabbed out team leader in Iraq and had to face Home every day without a limb. Or, my one close friend, having served as a Marine Scout Sniper in Iraq, just could not deal with facing a regular daily schedule.
These warriors and others slowly became Zeroed Out Veterans. They lost real connections with others while they were pictured as solving problems by the greater Veteran community. They were “Crushing it” every day according to social media. This virtual reality was far from the lived reality of the great warriors who have left us. Their sense of time was different to that time for the early wake up maximum performance time. I sensed in them that they seldom looked at the great leadership they exhibited towards many tough missions. I, after hearing about their deaths, thought about how they might have minimized their tremendous smiles of reassurance, their jokes, and their great energy. These are things that are not counted, but truly enjoyed. I was fortunate to experience such great things that were parts of their being. They had something for the world beyond a wakeup call to excellence. They were excellent human beings and had proven themselves in so many ways.
These days, I find myself ignoring that maximum performance time because I do not seek that darkness my brothers experienced. I want to see my son’s sports games and also laugh with him about my memories of him as a baby. And so, while I know the world demands of me so much. Inside, I realize that I demand of others to understand my time and that does not compromise great accomplishments or noble deeds.
The Zeroed-Out Veteran can take on Jocko’s positive message but add in
the priority of a deep internal human investigation of the Self. The Veteran
Self. This is tied to my concept of “Veteran Phenomenology” where the
Veteran is in active pursuit each day waking up and questioning: the daily
hesitations, the anxious moments while in uniform, the transformative learning insights, the close bonds that helped transcend the trials and challenges of warrior life. There must be room for a reflective space in the Veteran mind. This might help deal with the pressure to readjust according to institutions and people not even truly invested in your daily life. While the Veteran is forgotten by much of society, in that deep internal space there is a way to join the past with the present everyday life. One does not have to be seen as “0” because there are so many things from the past that have influenced the now.
The concept of time in Jocko’s World must be reassessed as the expectations of greatness is set up for “Waking Up” to perform every day starting at “Zero”. How about waking up to “become” or to “understand” or to “relate”? How about having this inner knowing that transcends “Zero”? This is my exploration I invite you on.
