This I Perceive…Learning from Scrooge as a Veteran Experiencing the Holidays
By Mike Kim Veteran
Blog Reflection #3
There is an unofficial (PSA) Public Service Announcement-like message about “The Holidays and the Combat Veteran” circulating across social media that sounds more like “Part 4. Special Instructions” of a tactical (WARNO) Warning Order. It seems to be directed to loved ones of Combat Veterans who might experience annoying behaviors and attitudes during this holiday season. All of this inspires me to think of the Christmas ghosts in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol was published in 1843. How can these Christmas ghosts be seen in light of the many Ebenezer Scrooge Veterans engaging loved ones during this holiday season?
The “PSA-like WARNO” message, from my interpretation, has “six considerations” for loved ones to be aware of: 1.The Beloved Combat Veteran is detached or disconnected from the holiday commercialism due to the miserable conditions of a combat deployment in some far off barren war zone 2. The Beloved Combat Veteran is thankful for the smallest things in life due to the conditions overseas while on deployment. 3. The Beloved Combat Veteran is caught up in mixed states of feeling grateful for not being the one who died in the War Zone while also feeling loss and guilt towards others who died OVER There. 4. The Beloved Combat Veteran is not the same anymore since War and primal survival is the mental priority: experiencing the next opportunity for “Chow” food, the next experience for “Shut Eye” sleep, and the experience of avoiding death, either by killing or not being killed. 5. The Beloved Combat Veteran is already overwhelmed from their war experience and needs space and empathy. 6. The Beloved Combat Veteran deep down inside is thankful for his/her family. The message has six considerations that might be viewed as six assumptions. It ends with a twist by encouraging Veterans to reach out to loved ones during this time of year while experiencing any of these six considerations during the holidays. Basically, the Beloved Combat Veteran does not need to experience war readjustment alone.
The hybrid message has me reflecting more about the actual holiday season lived realities of other Veterans. I am thinking about the many different nuanced Veteran experiences tied to service during the holidays not involving combat missions. Instead of dwelling on the six considerations about “The Holiday Combat Veteran” I have expanded my reflection. So, I guess I am that “Mr. Scrooge Veteran '' with a counter-narrative for civilians, active duty military personnel, and veterans to consider. My reflection does not minimize those who have experienced war in uniform. While it is a good thing to make an attempt to understand the beloved Combat Veteran, I also think that many different types of Veterans serving in diverse military branches with different military service experiences also carry distinct ghosts like Mr. Scrooge.
The ghosts from Dickens’ holiday story can be helpful to all Veterans and to their loved ones connected to the Veterans military service experience. So, the six considerations are insightful about certain real as well as mythologized war experiences for certain Veterans, but I wonder if there are holiday ghosts during this time of year that provide past, present, and future insights about the Veteran who served in the military with a wide array of valid service experiences not glamorized by mass media Yellow Ribbon military service member tributes?
The deeper Veteran exploration of the holidays exposes the before military enlistment or commissioning Holiday experiences of the Veteran? For example, my Christmas experiences with fellow warriors was more intimate for me than with my own family. What was it like during the holidays like while in uniform serving at a domestic military duty station in the United States or to have an experience while afloat out at sea? Or, just being out in the field training or providing security duty? I wonder about those who celebrate the holidays while on a military flight. How was it like for the Veteran to go on leave during this time of year? I knew certain military personnel who enjoyed not taking leave and finding peace without others around them. Were they content? These are questions to ask yourself as a Veteran. This is a self-interpretation involving Veteran experiences tied to the holidays. It is also something loved ones can inquire about?
I also wonder about the unseen or hidden holiday wishes and hopes generated during deployment for Combat Veterans while on deployment. How about the many other considerations besides the six mentioned in the message? How were the holidays after deployment? I have memories of every year after deployment because my son was born as I finished one deployment and then fully immersed in providing war trauma therapy to troops returning to the war zone. I just remembered each Christmas as my son would get older that he was my true gift as were the gifts I found in healing those with invisible and visible wounds of war. I remember failing as a parent because I needed to see one more Veteran. I also remember how forgiving my son is and that is truly a transformative holiday gift.
This year I plan to not send out cards, but appreciate the card my Norwich Military College barracks cadet roommate, Chris Toulouse (Straight OUTTA CC Ceremonial Company), sent me this year. I have hung that card up instead of having a Christmas tree. And that, by God, is AOK according to Scrooge Veterans throughout the country and abroad.
I have Marine Brothers who check on me every year. I wish I could be a better Marine by contacting other fellow Marines. I will stay in my bunker this Christmas and wait for the ghosts from Christmas to visit me. I will think about how war has torn my whole family apart and that there are redemptive moments from their direct war experiences as warriors and as civilians. I will ponder many things, not just war this Christmas in my apartment. I am more than the war I served in. I am even more than someone who wore a uniform. I have many lived experiences with meaning so I can explore and allow others to join me in this unfolding Veteran phenomena.
Thanks to the great folks at Coming Home Well and their tremendous work to help Veterans and to promote written pieces tied to my concept of Veteran Readjustment Phenomena.
Happy Holidays from a Scrooge Veteran!
